1. |
Pillow Overture
01:51
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I don't want to be like this. To have the same dream every night,
Where I'm swimming in a pool of blood that hardens over time.
Not moving anywhere, really...just hoping to find
A body I can fill with blood to pretend I've got someone on my mind.
Like a humanizing cover for an ill-adjusted lover.
Like a reason I can wake up, 'cause right now I don't eat that much.
Like a casket for my apathy; I'll watch as he gets buried,
And take a piss on hallowed ground...or could I even, really?
If my apathy ever left me,
What would that make me to myself?
Just a bag of bones who
Makes relationships before I'm sent to hell?
And to make myself clear,
I'm dissonant to the notes that I'm finding in the mirror.
Neurotic piece of shit.
(Wake up, lonely eyes.)
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2. |
Rinse, Repeat
02:11
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Day to day,
Nine-to-five,
Break a leg,
Optimize,
Meaningful destruction.
Vicodin,
Medicine,
Ambient
Happiness,
Meaningful destructon.
So live your life in quarters,
You awful fucking mess,
Patronizing borders,
Your idea of success
Is too small,
You'll never grow to be this tall,
So just give up now, and
Save yourself that painful fall.
But I find comfort in the time between,
From door to door, from beam to beam,
In this house I call a home,
I'm only lonely when I can't be alone,
It hurts to think of you these days,
But I'd be lying to implicate that I'm
Not okay, I'm just fine,
In my washed-up, mock-up swan song of a life.
Beat me,
You never wanted to, but
That's okay,
I'll find the pain somewhere else,
B-D-S, but the "M" is cliché,
Cause only the flawed are allowed to hurt themselves, I guess.
Well, if you're flawless, be my guest,
Tell me how the fuck I write this up,
In a timeline where I'm fine?
So I find comfort in the time between,
From door to door, from beam to beam,
In this house I call a home,
I'm only lonely when I can't be alone,
It hurts to think of you these days,
But I'd be lying to implicate that I'm
Not okay, I'm just fine,
In my washed-up, mock-up swan song of a life.
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3. |
Mamihla Piñata Pie
02:20
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Craig nearly begged me to come to this thing,
So I'm paying the meter to park on this torn-up street,
I questioned why at the time,
Until I turned at that moonlit streetlight.
There she is.
She's ashing her cigarette in a puddle on the street,
The first time I witnessed you suffocate a flame,
Once inches away from your teeth,
Oh God, I want it to be me.
There she is.
Couple shots down,
We're tuning everybody out,
I only want to hear you speak,
Estranged to the jealousy,
But you'll meet that piece of shit eventually.
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4. |
Hindrance
03:23
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I want you to bury me in sand,
Up to my chest,
Then you won't have to see my body,
But we can still be friends,
So maybe I can sexy talk you past that point,
And then you'll have to love me,
No matter how I'm shaped,
Or how I plan,
Or who I act like...
Right?
Styrofoam tablecloth,
Only two cups are ours,
But we don't care.
Whether we already had plans or not,
We'll passively just let them intersect.
(The architects of Tumblr texts are having sex in the next room)
(Hindrance, you left me bleeding)
All my life,
I made my peace with hating myself,
Until you changed me.
(You came around, you came around)
(You changed me)
My adult life
Had been a slow decent to Hell,
Until you changed everything, everything.
Breaking and entering,
Who wants to score some drinks tonight?
(I do, I do!)
The summer is ending,
So who wants to smoke and stay inside?
(I do, I do!)
Fuck my life
If I can't handle my own problems,
This isn't quite what I had in mind to solve them.
(The architects of Tumblr texts are having sex in the next room)
All my life,
I made my peace with hating myself,
Until you changed me.
(You came around, you came around)
(You changed me)
My adult life
Had been a slow decent to Hell,
Until you changed everything, everything.
The fireplace we never used,
The kitchen ceiling falling through,
The 15 months we got abused,
Until our new place followed through,
We bought a fucked up car
And drove until our backs collapsed,
We wrote a melody for everything,
I guess we'd never think like that again.
Our car broke down on the side of the highway,
But we still managed to make it to the city.
Though that town didn't like it,
I was having it my way,
Yeah, we still managed to make it to the city.
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5. |
Dead Weight
03:33
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Sometimes I pretend to limp for the attention,
But nobody ever says anything, well ain't that a bitch?
I just love the in-betweens,
The foundation underneath,
The person I am, one day, gonna be.
Sometimes I script out fights that never happen,
It's just something that I've done since I left Michigan,
A neurotic symptom of
What these 90's kids become,
When you have to raise your hand before you can speak up.
Don't tell me I'm okay,
There's something left to blame,
I'm not as confident,
As I am on the internet.
So lay on me tonight,
When you give up on life,
And I'll see what I can do,
To make us make it through.
Sometimes I make up facts just for the hell of it,
Probably just so I can feel relevant,
But the one things I can't do, I guess,
Is stay in love with you,
Or so you claim.
Rinse, repeat, again.
Don't tell me I'm okay,
There's something left to blame,
I'm not as confident,
As I am on the internet.
So message me tonight,
When you give up on life,
And I'll see what I can do,
To give up on life with you.
(Can you hear me now?)
I can't play it out,
The future in my head,
It used to be so adamant,
That I pay attention,
And now that I can see,
Who's right in front of me,
Who's right in front of me
Can't fall asleep next to me.
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6. |
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It's been half a day since I spoke to you,
And you're blowing up my phone,
Sending me messages about common sense
That are punctuated wrong,
I know the question mark drops off,
Whenever you think I'm off my leash,
But really I'm so attached that I run in circles,
And bind up your knees.
Every day is a race,
Who gets offended first?
Passive, yet aggressive glances,
I got in passing,
For getting on your nerves.
This is my elephant,
He overstays his welcome in this room,
This is the premise that I
Formulate myself upon,
The stares, they hurt,
The glares are worse,
But I can't really talk about that.
Don't tell me what you did that night,
The time we questioned you and I,
I'm curious, but fraudulent in
Being strong, so I'll cope with it.
Imaginary imagery,
It answers all but clarity,
Did you really have to leave me to wonder?
Every day is a race,
Who gets offended first?
Passive, yet aggressive glances,
I got in passing,
For getting on your nerves, so
Fuck you.
This is my elephant,
He overstays his welcome in this room,
This is the premise that I
Formulate myself upon,
The stares, they hurt,
The glares are worse,
But I can't really talk about
The minor threats, the loneliness
In unison we've felt for far too long,
The so-regretful stares,
Following a dialogue of snares,
So grow your hair out,
Just to spite me,
You don't have to change, just
Fucking ask me to leave.
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7. |
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You lose your place,
But you mark your page,
So you can pick up
Where you left off,
Even if you're late.
You keep a grip on your heart,
Cause I don't have one in your eyes,
Or at least not tonight,
And it's not fair to point fingers,
But it's not hard to see,
I know we both wish we could blame..
You.
Tainted
Acquaintance,
You don't feel that bad,
And I'm okay with that,
But don't you follow suit,
When I fall apart,
'Cause I can't hold you up
When I break your heart.
You sink real deep,
And that hurts me too,
My silver spoon just can't follow through,
Oh, please, just listen, baby, won't you?
But you never do.
You taste like rain,
And I feel like morning dew,
And I hate that pain,
But I hate sleeping alone more than you do.
Tainted
Acquaintance,
You don't feel that bad,
And I'm okay with that,
But don't you follow suit,
When I fall apart,
'Cause I can't hold you up
When I break your heart.
(You were the crack in my shell,
You were my heroin idol,
You played my own Mary Watson,
You wore my hands, stuck in idle,
You were the blood on the canvas,
You were the closest of calls,
You were my reason for breathing,
And now I'm feeling withdrawal,
You are the ghost in my sedan,
You are the spirit, the bottle,
You are my substance addiction,
You were my perfectly harbored
Manifestation of prison,
Painted our blood into blue,
You were the fight I pursued,
You are the fight I resume.)
Still, I'm,
Staring at your face,
Behind my phone in shame,
Wondering if I should call and
Finally just talk about my day,
Still, I've,
Lost your middle name in memory,
It hurts until it burns until it heals,
And I can't find a better way to deal,
So I will smoke and drink 'til I can't feel.
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Jo Trumble Indianapolis, Indiana
Midwest Thinkin' Music. 100% Guaranteed to be slightly in-key.
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